雅思写作是许多考生感到头疼的部分,不仅要求语言表达准确,还需要逻辑清晰、论证充分,想要在雅思写作中拿到高分,甚至考满分,必须掌握正确的写作方法和技巧,本文将提供一篇高质量的雅思作文范文,并详细解析其结构、词汇和论证逻辑,帮助考生提升写作水平。
雅思大作文题目
** Some people believe that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, think that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
高分范文
Public health has become a major concern in modern society, and governments worldwide are exploring effective strategies to enhance it. While some argue that expanding sports facilities is the most effective approach, others contend that additional measures are necessary. This essay will examine both perspectives before presenting a balanced conclusion.
On the one hand, proponents of increasing sports facilities argue that easy access to exercise opportunities encourages physical activity, which is crucial for preventing obesity, cardiovascular diseases, and other lifestyle-related illnesses. For instance, cities with well-developed public gyms, swimming pools, and running tracks tend to have higher rates of regular exercise among residents. Moreover, sports facilities foster community engagement, as people of different ages and backgrounds can participate in group activities, improving both physical and mental well-being.
On the other hand, critics of this approach point out that merely providing sports facilities does not guarantee their use. Many individuals lack the motivation or time to engage in regular exercise, regardless of the availability of facilities. In such cases, public health campaigns promoting healthier lifestyles might be more impactful. Additionally, dietary habits play a significant role in overall health, suggesting that policies regulating food advertising or subsidizing nutritious foods could yield better results.
In my view, while expanding sports facilities is beneficial, it should be part of a broader strategy. Governments should combine infrastructure development with educational programs and policy changes to address health comprehensively. For example, schools could integrate physical education into curricula, and workplaces might incentivize employees to stay active. Only through a multi-faceted approach can public health be significantly improved.
范文解析
结构分析
这篇范文采用了经典的“讨论双方观点+个人立场”结构,符合雅思大作文的要求:
- 引言段:明确话题,提出两种对立观点,并概述文章结构。
- 主体段1:支持增加体育设施的观点,列举具体理由和例子。
- 主体段2:反对观点,指出局限性并提出替代方案。
- 结论段:提出个人看法,强调综合措施的重要性。
词汇与句式
- 高级词汇:proponents(支持者)、contend(主张)、foster(促进)、incentivize(激励)。
- 复杂句式:
- "While some argue that..., others contend that..."(对比结构)
- "In such cases, public health campaigns... might be more impactful."(条件句)
- "Only through a multi-faceted approach can public health be significantly improved."(倒装句)
论证逻辑
- 举例论证:提到“拥有完善体育设施的城市居民锻炼率更高”,增强说服力。
- 对比论证:比较体育设施与健康教育、饮食政策的效果,使分析更全面。
- 解决方案:提出“综合措施”,体现批判性思维。
如何写出高分雅思作文
审题准确
确保完全理解题目要求,避免偏题,本题要求讨论“增加体育设施是否最有效”,而不是单纯讨论“体育设施的好处”。
逻辑清晰
每段围绕一个核心论点展开,使用连接词(Moreover, Additionally, However)使行文流畅。
语言多样
避免重复使用简单词汇,多替换同义词。“important”可替换为“crucial”、“significant”。
论证充分
每个观点都应提供理由和例子,避免空泛陈述,提到“体育设施促进社区参与”时,可补充具体案例。
常见错误与改进
-
语法错误:
- 错误:Increasing sports facilities can improves public health.
- 正确:Increasing sports facilities can improve public health.
-
词汇单一:
- 重复使用“good”:
改进:beneficial, effective, advantageous.
- 重复使用“good”:
-
论证不足:
- 薄弱论点:Sports facilities are helpful.
- 强化论点:Sports facilities encourage regular exercise, reducing the risk of chronic diseases.
个人观点
雅思写作高分的关键在于清晰的逻辑、丰富的词汇和充分的论证,考生应多练习不同题型,积累话题词汇,并学会从多角度分析问题,这篇范文展示了如何平衡讨论双方观点并提出合理建议,值得借鉴。